So...about that quest

I don't know if all of those goals will be accomplished. My family is in town, including my aunt and uncle Monu and Sonali from England and their relatively new son, who I've now met for the first time, two-year-old Anant, my Reenu Bhua, and my sister. I'm having tons of fun because the family makes me realize where I get all of my spunk from. Some interesting liaisons of influence worked together under just the right temperature and pressure to make me. (I sound like my dad describing how cooking works.) There is not a dull moment when you get the nine of us all together. I wish I could give you a more vivid image of this fun phenomenon; it's a good time-- that's all I can really say, without getting anecdotal, which I could, but I'm not in much of an anecdotal mood.

Suffice to say that my family is incredibly cute and funny. I am constantly thinking that I wish I had the video camera so I could remember these moments forever, or better, have some kind of paid camera crew to follow us all around so that we wouldn't have to carry the camera everywhere. We are so temperamental- all of us. One moment we are getting into a fight, next, we are laughing together. We're also all very different from one another, which makes our similarities even more interesting.

I've recently been getting nostalgic. I started reading my xanga from high school. I basically started my xanga in 8th grade, circa my musical renaissance because I wanted to be able to express my opinions without someone finding it from Google or something. I'd say that was about the most creative time in my life as far as thinking about things pretty deeply. Back then, I was kind of caught between being a high-schooler and a middle-schooler, meaning that I had all the desires of a seventeen-year-old girl, but all the freedom of a toddler. My computer, my magazines and books, the library and my friend Cassie, were the sole portals I had to some cooler form of life. That's when I started to get into some really great music, and thank god I did that before high school. I started remembering when Becca and I first became friends, and what we talked about. I remember thinking she was so cool because she did stuff for herself and went on adventures that I couldn't dream of going on like secretly taking buses to Chicago to meet up with her boyfriend.

I look back on myself now and think I was such an idiot back then with the way I looked at people and the way I acted, not considering the reactions of other people. But I guess you have to be an idiot sometime so you can learn from it or else you'll be an idiot forever and no one will want to remember you.